X = Time (The Grand Exception/How I Plan To Love You)

Time is the last thing you want to hear
But some answers remain true
Despite sincerest hopes my dear

And I wish I could say
That I was trying my best
I wish I could stand before all
Like Paul
And say that I have lived in good conscience

Before God
He who ponders all my paths
I can only default
My payments will not last

But then I stop
Everything counts
A little more than I think
It was never about
Pushing myself to the brink

I never had to live up
To some high expectations
Only show up each day
And serve without reservation

The combination of an open heart
With a willing mind
And calloused hands

Proves itself worthy
Outlasting the hourglass’s sands

Paradoxically only realized
If we take the thinking part out
Double checking progress
Removes any clout

That our actions carry
Let us not bury
Our impact today
With worry or dismay

The bottom line is we are blessed
And for this assertion I offer no proof
Just listen to your soul, late at night
When you hear rain upon the roof

Then get out, and do

Why else do we have time
If we are not meant to move*

*If this equation
Applies to you not
If you can’t fight off the demons
If you can’t hold off the rot
If you stumble and stumble
And repeatedly fall
If every second that passes
Slows your walk to a crawl
I offer no cheap solace
No magic quick fix
There is no fancy product
No smoke screens or tricks
To cover the pain and the hurt
And the bleeding and dirt
That mars what once resembled
A beautiful smile
Eyes quick and alert
You alone know your pain
Though therein lies the rub
I don’t offer understanding
Or disingenuous hugs
Merely my company
My willingness to exist
In your presence and in
My actions persist
To walk with you through
And hopefully out of this mist
You can make what you want
Out of my willingness to be
Next to you as battle inwardly
But I promise you
What I promise the others
Give it time
I reach out
As your brother
Give to me what you can
When you can
Nothing more nothing less
I’ll take it all
Your beautiful mess
Through every mistake
Deserved or no
You have perceived and experienced
You have continued to grow
And though you feel dull
Where in your youth you once glistened
I’m telling you now
You have power
And I’m willing to listen


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